The things we do on a routine basis impact how we see ourselves. And the opposite is also true: How we see ourselves can influence how we act.
In other words, our habits and our identity are closely tied to one another.
In this episode, we talk about how to make sure that connection between our behavior and our identity is working for us and not against us.
- There’s an important difference between acknowledging a trait or circumstance that you’d like to change and allowing it to define you.
- It can be easier to persist in a new behavior (or set of behaviors) if we work on building an identity that supports it.
- Linking your behaviors to your core values helps to reinforce positive habits and identity
- Who we associate with can have a powerful effect (either positively or negatively) on our progress toward our goals.
Lab Experiment (download a copy)
Try this CBT technique (called STOPP)
1. STOP: If you hear yourself using terms to describe yourself that seem limiting, stop.
2. TAKE A BREATH: Breathe in and out a few times slowly.
3. OBSERVE: What am I really saying about myself? What do these words or terms cause me to think about myself?
4. PERSPECTIVE: Consider the bigger picture. Is this an important fact about me? Could there be a different way of presenting this aspect of myself? What would someone else say about you if they were asked?
5. PRACTICE: Don’t just do this once. Replacing a well rehearsed identity will take time, so don’t give up!